The Art of Becoming

I balk at screen time for my children. This is my membership card to parenthood: television disdain. Don't get me wrong, I personally love the tv, love binge watching shows, and we have a standing tradition of Friday as Family Movie Night. But the kids can get so locked in to only wanting the tv, that we had to draw a line. Prior to quarantine we had a rule in our house: no screen time on school days. Get your homework done, practice your instrument, play outside with friends. Now in the time of Coronavirus where screens provide the distance learning? There's no attendance at a school building on screen days. Things have really gone south. One day during quarantine, the kids wanted to watch tv. This day was feeling exactly the same as the last 27 days - a blur of days running together. But since it was Earth Day, I was feeling generous and earthy, so I told them they could watch the Jane Goodall documentary mid-afternoon. The mere mention of possible screen time was enough t...

We have no shortage of lessons to be learned while stuck at home together. Long ago, back when people went to the store with children and we had no fear of disease transmission, I took my three children to Target. This is not advisable: don't take three children to Target. After 6.5 years of having three children, I still haven't learned this truism. *sigh* I let them play in the toy section. Again, do as I say, not as I do. Don't let children play in the toy section at Target. Only bad things can happen. If I remember correctly, I was looking for a desk lamp and light bulb for Sean's room. I was trying to entice him to keep his bedroom desk clean so that he could do homework there. (How silly I was! Why would he ever need a desk at home to do his work?) I was also looking for a birthday present for Audrey's friend's birthday coming up. This was back in the day when children celebrated birthdays with their friends. In person. I remember coming circling t...

It's hard enough for me to understand the contours of this global pandemic. I think it's even harder for the kids. I've heard them putting it into games of tag: kids: If you get tagged, then you have the Coronavirus and you die. Sheesh. Or they've tried making it personal: Audrey: If the Coronavirus was a person, I would be really angry at them. me: Why's that? Audrey: Because why did it have to happen now? Over my birthday and Sean's birthday, and Easter, and our trip to Disney World? Tears come in the most unexpected places. One night when I thought they were all asleep, I went to the top of the stairs to turn off the hallway light. The moment I did it, I heard both girls asking me to turn it back on. They had been laying there for over an hour, not sleeping, and when I spoke to them, they each teared up. Audrey: I'm just really sad that we're not going back to school. Frankie: I just can't go to sleep. I keep trying, and I'...

I have heard people in an older generation from mine discuss the benefits of simpler times. "Back when we were kids..." and extol the virtues of playing outside, running free, unscheduled hours of time where they came up with their own games. Some of those same people have now said that this will be the same for my children. They are now getting the unstructured freedom that quarantine has to offer. I don't fully disagree. With my children currently on a break from the schooling-at-home (or Crisis Schooling, as one friend is calling it) they are achieving new levels of unscheduled freedom, or as they like to call it: boredom. For example: Ping pong paddles for Easter have proven to be a big hit. Do we have a ping pong table? No, we do not! Have people been playing ping pong? Eh - maybe once or twice. But what's really taken their attention has been bouncing the ping pong ball on the paddle repeatedly to see who can get the most hits without dropping the ball. Yester...